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I am a blogger who specializes in using blogs to blog.

Friday, September 28, 2007

Time, Hamlet, and Civics

So I'm sitting in civics class realizing I haven't posted in a while, and that since I have nothing to do, I should probably post something. So...here I am.

The reasons for my lack of Blog-updating activity are many and varied, and if you read the subtext of my last entry, you should be able to figure it out for yourself. Basically, I'm in Jack and the Beanstalk, I'm taking driver's ed (finally), I'm trying to get all my homework done, and I've also just gotten into the Senior Youth Repretory Company of the New Hampshire Theater Project.

Oh yeah! Probably should have mentioned that! The audition I'd been preparing for since god only knows when, finally happened! I memorized a whole page an a half of Shakespeare for that, a speech from Henry IV part II, and I got in!!!! :D

However, that leaves me with yet another thing to do, which as you can probably tell by my Blogging activity of late, isn't exactly a good thing. I had every intention of writing before school started again, I had this awesome entry planned out about a trip to upstate New York that involved Bat Boy, glass museums, and Irish guys in hot tubs, but I was too busy.

ARRRRGHA!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, so I was going for AH!! or AG!!! or something, but I sort of got it wrong. Sorry about that, everyone.

Anyway, I wish I had more to say, but I really don't. I wish I had a witty story, or an interesting tidbit of observation or even a review of some movie or something, but I don't. I really really don't. The closest thing I've got is the fact that I accidentally hit Jack in the head with a mop last week, and that was just an accident! I also mastered the kazoo! I can parallel park! And. oh, wait for it, I bought a dress! oOoOo, I'm the height of excitement, aren't I?

Of course, I have to be careful what I say on here now, as I've recently found out this Blog is read by far more people than I thought it was, most of whom are in someway related to me, and could quite possibly come and hunt me down...or something. Not that I think any of my relatives would (though, you never know...)

Also, more proof that I barely have any time to do anything, I haven't been able to comment on anything Doctor Who related lately! So many things have happened, David Tennant's staying, Freema Agyeman's leaving (though coming back) and Catherine Tate is coming back as Donna. David Tennant's going to play Hamlet, for God's sakes, HAMLET!!!! The only bad thing about this is that I'm not going to be able to see him, and I haven't even been able to write an entry complaining about it! I swear! This is madness!!!

So, my friend next to me desperately wants me to look for an article to do an article review on (since I have the laptop) which means I probably have to go. I finally get a few minutes of free time, and I still can't write a whole entry. O, what porrents are these?!




...ten points to anyone that can define "porrents" it was in my monolouge


Gotta go to Google,

*Nelly*

Monday, September 17, 2007

Nelly and the Beanstalk

Long ago, in a small village in the land of New Hampshire, there lived a young woman called Nelly. Nelly was a very nice young woman, she was funny, kind, happy, ravishingly beautiful, if I do say so myself, and of course, responsible.

Now Nelly, apart from feeding the chickens and skipping merrily through the fields and such, had one simple little job to do as often as she could. Nelly was a "blogger" which meant that every so often Nelly would have to journey up the stairwell of her large, wooden house and sit in front of her computer to type up a Blog entry. Nelly did this as often as she could, as she knew she had many loyal readers wishing to read her remarkable and wholly insightful thoughts on the universe, until one day, everything changed.

One day Nelly was skipping merrily along, on her way to dutifully write a nice Blog entry for her readers about her lovely vacation with her family (and Bat Boy) and about her first few days at school, when suddenly, out of nowhere, a great, enormous beanstalk grew out of the ground in front of her, blocking the pathway to the computer. Nelly regarded the beanstalk with both fear, awe, and disappointment at this terrible cliche.

"What could this be?" Nelly asked the air, "Why is there a beanstalk trying to block my way? Whatever could this mean?" As she grew closer to the beanstalk, she began to gasp as she realized what it truly was.

"Why this beanstalks made of homework assignments!" cried Nelly with a shock, "it's every homework assignment I've had since the school year began! Here's the debate papers, the Spanish words, the algebra problems, my chemistry lab, my Beowulf report...it's even got that project I did for civics! Golly gee, do you think maybe I should climb it?"

And so Nelly began the long and tediously boring climb up the homework beanstalk. Staying steady through most of the journey, though slipping slightly on the algebra problems, she began to think her prospects were bright for now, as she finally neared the top of the long and winding educational plant. As she stepped off the beanstalk however, she realized she'd suddenly found herself in a place much worse than she could have possible imagined. She heard footsteps.

"FE FI FO FUM!!" A voice shouted from nowhere, "I SMELL THE BLOOD OF AN UNEXPERIENCED DRIVER!!!"

"Oh no!" said Nelly suddenly as the loud footsteps grew closer, "It can't be!" A tall man thundered into the room, large and covered in authoritative looking badges and saftey equipment, he regarded Nelly with as much respect as one would typically give to a safety pin. Feircely as he could, he banged his fist on the table before him.

"I AM THE DRIVER'S ED GIANT!!!" he roared at the top of his lungs, "IT IS I WHO COMMAND YOUR LIFE FOR THE NEXT FIVE WEEKS, IT IS I WHO CONTROL YOUR DRIVING FUTURE!!! NOW KNEEL BEFORE ME AND GIVE ME THE DEFINITION OF A TRAFFIC LIGHT!!!"

"Never!" shouted Nelly back at the giant, but then suddenly found herself surrounded by fierce, gleaming drivers manuals. The manuals surrounded her, till she was trapped inside a cold, hard, driving related prison. "You'll never get away with this!" she shouted from her dungeon.

"OF COURSE I WILL!!!" shouted the giant, "I AM THE DRIVER'S ED GIANT, I REIGN SUPREME OVER ALL OTHER FORMS OF ACTIVITIES, I AM THE FINAL PRIORITY, AND ALL THAT SHALL MATTER IN YOUR LIFE FOR FIVE STRAIGHT WEEKS!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" And with the sound of the giant's laughter, the homework beanstalk on top of which Nelly was currently standing on, began to collapse beneath her, sending her spiraling down a deep, dark pit of homework, essays, driver's manuals and observation hours.

"NOOOOOO!!!" Nelly shouted helplessly as she spiraled down further, and further into the pit of unfinished work and hours. Then suddenly, almost as suddenly as the tale began, she landed with a thud on her bedroom floor, her laptop sitting directly in front of her. She looked at the date at the bottom of the screen, and realized with a gasp that nearly an entire month had gone by since she was blocked by the terrible beanstalk. "Oh my," she said gasping, "my readers!"

And so, boys and girls, that is the tale of Nelly and the beanstalk, the true reason this blog has not been updated in over a month. The Driver's Ed. part of it is still in the process of being slain, but the beanstalk of homework was eventually destroyed.

The moral of the story? Never decide to audition for a children's theater play at exactly the same time you've got a thousand other things going on. Remember that children, it's definitely a life lesson.

And Nelly, the laptop, and the Driver's Ed giant/instructor all lived relatively decently ever after. The End.



...or is it?

*Nelly*